


keep on going when it's all falling apart

by musicals_musicals



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Cuddling & Snuggling, First Kiss, Flashbacks, Fluff, Hiding in a Bush, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Overuse of italics, Post-Canon, alex goes to julies dance class no i do not take crtisism, alex is basically the heart eyes emoji, luke is mentioned and stuff but he never speaks so he doesnt get tagged, no pining they did enough pining in s1, obviously, theyre really big on hand holding but we already knew that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:02:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27157678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicals_musicals/pseuds/musicals_musicals
Summary: It has been exactly 14 days since Alex last talked to Willie. He's lying outside the studio on the ground, staring at the sky and thinking about Willie (he is not poutingJulie). Thinking about his smile and his laugh and the fact that Alex can’t help him, no matter how hard he tries.He is trying to decipher what one of the clouds looks like (a cat? holding an umbrella?) when something new casts a shadow over his face from the other direction. He turns and squints into the sun, trying to make out any identifiable features. Of all things the figure looks like Willie, and that really doesn’t bode well if Alex is starting to see things.“Alex?”Wait. That sounds like Willie.In a feat of deductive reasoning Alex puts 2+2 together and realizes that it probably is Willie.
Relationships: Alex & Julie Molina & Reggie & Flynn, Alex & Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 332





	keep on going when it's all falling apart

**Author's Note:**

> what tense am i in? past? future? none? all? who the hell knows, i sure don't. i'll be honest I fussed with this a lot (its been copied to ao3 with tags and notes for 3 or 4 days now) because I was having trouble getting it right but I just did one final readthrough/edit and rewrote most of the stuff i was unhappy with!

In theory the week after they play the orpheum should be good, considering they have successfully evaded a second death(?). The only problem is Alex is worried about Willie, like really worried. He hasn’t seen Willie since they were at Caleb’s club and assuming he didn’t read their last interaction _very very_ wrong he really thinks Willie wants to see him again and isn't planning to just ignore him for the rest of eternity.

Luckily the week mostly proceeds in a normal fashion which keeps Alex pretty distracted. He goes to band rehearsal, hangs out with Reggie in Julie’s kitchen while he talks to Ray, goes with Julie to school one day to hang out in her dance class, goes for a walk around the theater district with Luke (who spends a solid 30 minutes talking about Julie), and even gets recruited by Flynn to talk to Julie about Luke because she "needs back up for when I tell Julie she's an idiot" (her words).

( _“How about we talk about Alex and his ghost boyfriend” Julie deflected Flynn’s newest question ("Julie why haven't you just asked him out yet") and pointed at Alex where he was sitting peacefully on the foot of Julie’s bed. This had been going on for a while, Flynn would ask Julie things, Julie would dodge with an excuse, Flynn would destroy the excuse, and then the entire process repeated._

_“Ghost boyfriend?” Flynn asked, turning to Alex with an absolutely terrifying smile on her face._

_“I thought we were here to talk about Julie and Luke,” Alex stuttered, shoving Julie's arm away._

_Julie told Flynn what he said and she considered it for a few seconds “Nope! I’ve heard enough Luke-pining for the next decade. Tell me about the ghost boyfriend”_

_“Reggie,” Alex looked at his friend for support, “Help”_

_Reggie shook his head smiling (like a traitor) at Alex “No, I think that I also want to hear about the ghost boyfriend”_

_“Ugh,”_

_“Alex just collapsed dramatically on the bed” Julie told Flynn._

_“I hate you” Alex glared at Julie “Just give me the whiteboard already”_

_Julie cheered and passed over the whiteboard that Alex, Luke, and Reggie used to communicate with Flynn and Carlos._

_“He’s not technically my boyfriend,” Alex started, before being cut off by Reggie._

_“I thought you went on dates?”_

_“What? No, we like, hang out and talk”_

_“That sounds like a date,” Julie pointed out (it seemed unfair for her to be giving relationship advice when she was still playing back and forth with Luke, but to Alex's shock Flynn didn't call her out)._

_“It's not–" Alex sighed and changed course "I haven't even seen him since the orpheum. Maybe he forgot about me”_

_“Alex he’s clearly in love with you, he's probably just busy or something” Reggie pointed out, he turned to Julie “You should’ve seen them the first time we went to the club, they spent the whole time staring at each other with real hearts in their eyes”_

_“There were no hearts!” Alex paused, rethinking his words. He didn't know exactly what he looked like around Willie, and he had always been bad at hiding stuff like that, also Willie did have that one face that he made sometimes... “Okay maybe there were a few hearts”_

_“Well I think you should just go for it, maybe you’ll inspire our dear friend Julie before she kills me from all of this Luke talk” Flynn placed her hands on Julie’s shoulders and shook her lightly “You clearly like each other and you’re already dead so it can’t go that badly!”)_

Later Alex goes to all the places he can think of looking for Willie. He spends hours down at the beach watching the cops stop skateboarders (and subsequently messing with their stuff until they let each skater off with a warning), he goes to the museum and sits on the bench that they moved together, goes back to the orpheum and stands on the sidewalk where Willie first crashed into him. Willie never appears.

On the tenth day Alex makes an executive decision and goes to the club. He hides in a bush (hedge?) and _finally_ sees Willie, even if it’s from a distance.

Alex is too far away to hear anything but he watches Willie pass out programs with a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. Alex stays in the hedge, watching for what must be at least an hour.

He finally prepares to make his move when Willie is handing a program to the last person in line, it's a young woman who laughs when her hand passes through his to grab the program. He’s not exactly sure what he’s going to do once he gets Willie’s attention, maybe grab him and drag him as far away from the club as possible, or just wave awkwardly (who is he kidding; he's going to wave awkwardly)

Unfortunately he doesn’t get the chance to find out. Right as he’s about to jump out of the hedge Caleb appears behind Willie and puts a hand on his shoulder. Caleb looks around and Alex stands as still as possible, only moving when Caleb looks back at Willie. Alex barely restrains himself from jumping out of the hedge to charge Caleb when he sees Willie’s face, he looks so.... small. Alex wishes he could give Willie some kind of sign that he's there, but instead he’s stuck hiding, watching as Willie looks around one more time before following Caleb inside.

\-----

It has been exactly 14 days since Alex last talked to Willie. He's lying outside the studio on the ground, staring at the sky and thinking about Willie (he is not pouting _Julie_ ). Thinking about his smile and his laugh and the fact that Alex can’t help him, no matter how hard he tries. 

He is trying to decipher what one of the clouds looks like (a cat? holding an umbrella?) when something new casts a shadow over his face from the other direction. He turns and squints into the sun, trying to make out any identifiable features. Of all things the figure looks like Willie, and that really doesn’t bode well if Alex is starting to see things.

“Alex?”

 _Wait. That sounds like Willie._ In a feat of deductive reasoning Alex puts 2+2 together and realizes that it probably _is_ Willie. He jumps to his feet, accidentally leaving his hat on the concrete, but who the hell cares because it is Willie. Willie who Alex hasn’t seen in two weeks now, Willie who has probably spent the last two week with Caleb watching his every move, Willie who Alex _misses_ like he’s missing a part of himself.

“Hello,” Alex breathes, he wants nothing more than to hug him, possibly for the rest of eternity, but Willie already looks a little nervous and Alex couldn’t take it if he made him uncomfortable, so instead he stops a foot away and forces his arms to stay at his sides “I missed you”

“I missed you too” Willie reaches out to take Alex’s hand “I’m sorry I couldn’t find you sooner”

Alex stares at Willie’s hand. He hadn’t realized it before but a part of him still doubted that Willie was actually there, but here is his proof. “You don’t need to apologize. It’s not your fault” He rubs his finger over the back of Willie’s hand, ghost hand holding is a little weird, after all they don’t have real bodies and can walk through walls, but Willie’s hand is still warm. “Do you want to go inside?” He gestures to the studio and Willie nods, follows Alex through the door without letting go of his hand.

The second they step inside Willie visually relaxes, letting out a breath and stepping closer to lean against Alex’s side “It’s so nice to not feel watched”

They sit on the couch, Willie’s head on Alex’s shoulder and Alex’s head on Willie’s. Alex stares at their hands where they are still clasped, it makes him feel warm (despite being dead), especially after 2 weeks of worrying if they would ever be able to hold hands again. “Has it been… bad?”

Willie huffs a laugh and squeezes Alex’s hand “If you mean Caleb barely letting me out of his sight for two weeks, it’s fine. It just puts me a little on edge”

That’s….. not super comforting. Alex once again wishes Caleb and his stupid club could just disappear into oblivion. Alex sits up slightly to face Willie “I’m still so sorry, if I hadn’t–”

Before Alex can finish Willie sits up beside him and puts a hand over his mouth “Alex we’ve been over this. I made my choice, you have nothing to apologize for. Chill”

And _wow_ Alex is like, totally listening, but also Willie’s hand is still warm and it smells like some kind of floral soap, and the look on his face is adorable, and Alex is dead but like, he also feels like he might die if he doesn’t get to kiss Willie.

Willie squints at the look on Alex’s face and moves his hand to poke Alex’s cheek. _He’s adorable_ “That doesn’t look like chill”

Alex forces the fog from his mind and pushes Willie’s hand away “I’m chill, I’m just… also worried. I can multitask”

Luckily Willie doesn’t call him out on the blatant contradiction, he just pulls Alex closer to use him as a pillow again. They sit in a peaceful silence, Alex focuses on Willie’s breaths (from what he can tell ghosts don’t _need_ to breathe, but it’s instinctual and nearly every ghost he's met still does it) and the way he feels pressed against Alex’s side, the angle gives Alex a perfect view of Willie’s eyelashes and the tip of his nose. After so much rushing and running around Alex is perfectly content to just exist with Willie.

There are probably important things Alex could be thinking about, Julie and Luke wrote a new song that he needs to find a drum beat for, he's trying to memorize the dance that he's learning in Julie's dance class, he's a ghost with only vague concepts of ghost logic, but instead he spends the whole time thinking about Willie. He thinks about his endless kindness, his patience when Alex was asking stupid questions about being dead, the cute little hair flip thing he does when he takes off the helmet. He makes Alex so _so_ happy, and Alex really wants to kiss him. He loses track of time a little, startling when Willie speaks.

“I should probably go” Willie interrupts Alex’s thoughts and he takes a second to catch up “Caleb will be expecting me to check in soon”

"Oh, right" Alex stands up and offers his hand to Willie, who takes the offered hand and uses it to stand up.

“I wish I could stay” Willie puts his hand into his pocket (the one that Alex isn't holding)

“I do to” Alex hesitantly reaches out and brushes back the hair that had fallen into Willie’s face.

Willie smiles at him before he hesitantly takes a step towards the door. Just as their hands are about to come apart he pauses, turning back with what Alex can only describe as a determined expression “I really like you, Alex. You know that right?”

Alex blinks a few times while the words process, but once they do he practically melts “I know. I really like you too”

Alex isn’t sure who leans in first, but next thing he knows, Willie’s face is inches from his own and he’s perfect and smiling so Alex pulls him closer and finally _finally_ kisses him.

**Author's Note:**

> cannot believe my first real jatp fic doesn't have julie front and center where she belongs. absolutely unacceptable. luckily i have a few things in the works that will hopefully be postable some day
> 
> find me on tumblr [@izzy-mccalla](http://izzy-mccalla.tumblr.com/) I'll be making a post about this and pinning it at the top so please rb it if you liked the fic! kudos and comments are fun and keep me writing!


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